CO­DEPENDENCY CHARACTERISTICS (Cont'd):

14. We may have a tendency toward episodes of depression, which we try to

forestall through the excitement provided by an unstable relationship.

15. To experience a one on one relationship, we are not attracted to a person who is kind, stable, reliable and interested in us. We find such "nice" people boring.

16. Since we have an overdeveloped sense of responsibility, it is easier for us to be concerned with others needs rather than ours. We tend not to take care of ourselves emotionally, physically, spiritually, and/or psychologically. This focus on others, in turn, has enabled us to avoid looking closely at our own faults.

17. We "stuff" our feelings from our traumatic childhoods and have lost the ability to feel or express our feelings because it hurts too much­­our feelings our frozen.

18. We tend to sooner or later become isolated from and afraid of people and authority figures.

19. We have become approval seekers and have lost our identity in the process.

20. We are frightened by angry people and any personal criticism.

21. We live from the viewpoint of victims and are attracted by that weakness in our love and friendship relationships.

22. We judge ourselves harshly and without mercy.

23. We experience guilt feelings when we stand up for ourselves instead of giving in to others.

24. We confuse love with pity and tend to "love" people we can pity and rescue.

25. We tend to be perfectionistic and judgmental.

26. We are reactors in life rather than actors.

27. We are entangled in our relationships and we either lean excessively on another (or tolerate that behavior from another) rather than standing as separate individuals reaching out to relate to and help one another.

Sunday at 3 p.m.

St. Joseph ACOA; Hackensack St. & Hoboken Rd.; E. Rutherford, N.J.


Source Anonymous
Last Revised -- Monday, November 11, 1996 10:26:20 PM
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